Hello friends. Thanks for spending some of your time reading my thoughts. If you follow this blog closely, you may notice I’m a day late with this post. For months, I posted here every Tuesday, and then life took a turn and I stopped writing for a long time. I’ve been so proud of myself these last weeks for getting back into the routine of posting regularly, not missing a week for the first time in three years.

And then came yesterday. It was a mostly normal Tuesday (aside from going to the shop which had normally been a Monday trip). However, the days leading up to yesterday felt anything but normal. I spent part of the weekend in tears, feeling hurt and burdened about things happening in the States. I spent other moments in tears after receiving sweet messages from friends that left me feeling seen, known and loved. I had moments of excitement over large sections of my jigsaw puzzle coming together, and moments where I wanted to throttle a housemate for using the milk I had saved for my Monday morning pre-walk cup of coffee. (For those who don’t know me, this is an unusual level of anger over a largely insignificant event.)

So, last night, as I ascended the stairs at nearly 9pm after cleaning and dinner with the housemates, I made the choice to give myself grace. I thought about pushing myself to get words on the screen, making up something just to satisfy a self-imposed expectation. But instead, I sat down in front of my jigsaw puzzle again, chatted with a friend for a bit, and let myself just be still for a while.

This season, this year even, has been a lot. We keep hearing that, but it really is true. Most days, I can find something to write about or go for the prayer-walks; I can read the book my team or house group is discussing, or record a song for an online service or event. But there are other days where the weight of the season catches up, and I have to give myself grace to hide in my room and put a few pieces of a puzzle in place.

I am happy to report that I have not throttled anyone, and after an evening of finding some pieces, I’m feeling content and at peace today. Circumstances haven’t changed in the U.S. or other situations that have brought concern, but in being still and not striving to meet my own demands, I allowed my heart to rest and remember that I can hand the weight I carry for those situations to God.

I don’t know what weight you’re carrying. It’s probably not the same as mine. Some things happening in the world are affecting all of us, and some are individual concerns or battles. (Even those events that affect us all do so in different ways and at different levels.) Whatever may be weighing you down this week, give yourself grace. (Sometimes this is harder than being grace-filled toward others.) Find the things you can do to take care of yourself, be present in the moments you’re living now, and maybe set aside the to-do list for a wee while. Tasks will still be there tomorrow, and you might be more prepared to conquer that list if you allow yourself to be still, hand the weight to God, and enjoy the small joys of this moment.